Posted by: lianaaa | July 9, 2009

Help me, Alma, you’re my only hope!

Superman graduated from Cornell and HE didnt have any trouble finding a job...

Superman graduated from Cornell and HE didn't have any trouble finding a job...

This morning at 10 I managed to get my eternally sleeping ass into an upright position (it took a lot of pillows and almost no actual muscle function) and called the ol’ Alma Mater for a career counseling phone session.

Now, in my experience and those of many of my friends, Cornell Career Services is largely kind of a joke.  It boggles the mind, why the University is closing down whole academic programs but continues to run CCS.  But for two good experiences, one with a student and the other with one of maybe two competent folks who actually work there, every time I went into CCS offices, I came out with exactly the same useless advice: Use the Internet.  Oh, you mean EXACTLY WHAT I’VE BEEN DOING THIS WHOLE TIME WHAT IS THE MATTER WITH YOU AND WHY ARE YOU GETTING PAID.

I get the whole “You can lead a horse to water but you can’t make him drink” thing.  I do.  They can only do so much before they’re cold writing your cover letter and fielding interview questions for you.  And I’ll even admit, I’m a hard customer to work with.  I’ve got weird interests that lead me to weird things, and responding to “What are your life goals?” with “I want to own a sex shop of magnificent proportions” can make things tough for a counselor.  But all I ever got out of those “counseling” sessions was a couple Web sites to check out and a pile of papers titled “What To Do With a Degree in the Humanities.”  (I still don’t know.)

This morning, however, I spoke with a woman who seemed like she genuinely wanted to help me out.  She asked what I’d been doing to search, where my interests lie (I was somewhat more reticent this time), et cetera.  Then she offered to critique my resume and cover letter–something they’d usually pawn me off on a student for–and to scan and send me a list of companies I might be interested in.  Sometimes it’s hard enough to find the damn opportunities, so this last bit was appreciated.

Now that THAT’S taken care of, it’s high time I rolled over for a nap.  Phone sessions?  Totally exhausting.


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